Izizathu zokuba kutheni iParis yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu

Ifoto ngu I-Basile hemidy

Ndineengxaki ezininzi emva kokuxelela abahlobo bam ukuba ndifuna ukuphuma kwindawo yabazali bam kumbindi weParis. Akukho namnye kubo, nkqu nolona luvo lusengqiqweni, onokuqonda ukuba kutheni ndifuna ukurenta indlu encinci, ephangaleleyo kwihlomela lendawo elibiza imali eninzi, poky shit embindini wesixeko.

Mhlawumbi andikhangeli nje izinto ezifanayo ebomini njengabo. Ndiyazi ukuba ukungena rhoqo kwi-crap yenja kwaye kufuneka uphephe ukuzuza i-honeymooners yaseBritani i-chic kwaye iyinkqantosi kunye nazo zonke izinto ezibhalwa ngabantu malunga neParis kwiitawuli zokutya ezintsha. Kodwa kukho izinto endikhetha ukuzenza ngaphandle kokuzikhathaza ngokungabikho koluntu ngokwaneleyo-njengokuqinisekisa ukuba ndingafikelela kuhlobo oluthile lokutya emva kokunikezela ngetyala lesizwe kumninimzi waseBermuda, qho ngenyanga.

Ewe, kukho izinto ezithile ezihlangulayo malunga nesixeko; kuninzi ekufuneka kwenziwe kunasedolophini kwaye ndiyazithanda ezo zakhiwo zaseHaussmannian ezikwiRue de Rivoli. Kodwa zizakhiwo-ngubani onika i-fuck? Ndijonge iStrato kwifowuni yam.

IParis yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu. Nasi isizathu.

Ifoto nge

AMAKHOSI APHALISI
Xa ndandisemncinci babebizwa ngokuba ngabachas. Kule mihla, babizwa ngokuba ziibobos (ezimele i-bourgeois bohème). Kodwa utshintsho lwegama alunamsebenzi; Zisengamajeriks afanayo azakuthi aqokelele umbhiyozo wendlu yonke ngokuthatha ipipi kukhetho lwe-wardrobe yomntu wasemzini, ngaphandle kwento yokuba zonke zibonakala ngathi ziipenisi ezingalukanga, iintloko zabo zisongelwe kumaleko eenwele ezishicilelweyo.

Ukuba ungumkhenkethi, nantsi eyona ndlela isebenzayo yokuchonga i-bobo: Zizo ezo ntlobo zedickhead ezizodwa, oya kuthi xa ucela umkhombandlela, zikubethe ngokungathi usandula ukudideka i-APC ye-YMC- okanye ezinye iintloni ngokulinganayo ukongamela-ngaphambi kokungakuhoyi kwaphela.

AMANTOMBAZANA AMA PARISI
Ndifuna ukunqanda ukwenza izinto ngokubanzi malunga nesini esifanelekileyo sedolophu, kodwa ingxaki kukuba zininzi kakhulu zizonke - ukuba zinekratshi, ziyadika, ziyadika kwaye zishushu- ziyinyani. Ngokuzimisela, iyafana noKristen Stewart, emi kwiHolo leZipili, ekufundisa ngolawulo lobuhle bakhe.

Iimoto
Konwabele ukubeka emngciphekweni ubomi bakho ngalo lonke ixesha uwela indlela? Ngaba udanile kukungabikho kwengozi ebandakanyeka kuhambo lwemoto lwemizuzu emithathu? Fudukela eParis! Abaqhubi apha abazukubila izinto ezincinci (imithetho yendlela, ubomi babahambi ngeenyawo) nanini na kukho ithuba elifutshane lokutshintshela kwigiya yesibini. Ixesha eliseleyo, nangona kunjalo, zilungiselele ukuchitha yonke imini yakho uhleli endleleni.

Ungcoliseko
Ucinga ukuba akunanjongo kwaphela ukuba nemoto eParis, ubungacinga ukuba intlantsi ethile eqaqambileyo ngesele iyinqandile i-guzzlers yegesi kwaye endaweni ye-Peugeot platoon nge-trams eziqhutywa lilanga kunye neebhasi ezixubileyo. Kodwa akukho thamsanqa. Ngapha koko, ukukhutshwa kubi kakhulu kangangokuba sawela umda omtsha wongcoliseko ngoMatshi, ngomgangatho womoya ngoku iphikisana naleyo yaseBeijing -Esinye sezixeko ezingcolisekileyo emhlabeni.

Ifoto ngu UMelchior Tersen

IINKCUKACHA-HALLE
Ixesha olichitha kule mall-cum-cinema-cum-metro-station enkulu yindlela elungileyo yokuchaza ukuba bumnandi kangakanani ubomi bakho. Ewe kunjalo, ngaphandle kokuba uyonwabele ngokwenyani ukunika iicuba kwabantwana abaneminyaka eli-16 ubudala benxibe njenge-post-Trukfit Lil Wayne - kwimeko enjalo, yiba nayo.

IPARIS ENTSHA
Okwenzekayo ngoku eParis kuyafana nakwesinye isixeko esikhulu; abantu bafuna ukufudukela kwiindawo ezonakeleyo kuba bapholile, kodwa ngaphambi kokuba abaphuhlisi abade baguqule wonke ummandla, amaxabiso aphume kubantu abahlala apho ukusukela ngaphambi kokuba abafundi bezobugcisa bangene kwaye baguqule zonke iipropathi ezindala zinomtsalane iikhonkrithi zekhonkrithi zeebhanki kunye nabantu abaziqhayisa ngohlahlo-lwabiwo mali lweveki.

Kuthi sonke, ngoku phantse kube nzima ukuhlala eParis ngaphandle kokuthoba ( into engekho mthethweni ) okanye umsebenzi wamanani amathandathu (ekunzima ukuwufumana). Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuhlala, zilungiselele ukuhlawula ubuncinci ama-670 eeyuro ngenyanga [£ 550] kwigumbi lokulala eliphindwe kabini njengekhitshi, igumbi lokuhlala kunye nendlu yangasese.

ABALINDI
Ndiyazi ukuba le yinto nje, kodwa kukho izizathu ezilungileyo zokuba kutheni izinto zisiba yingxoxo. Andiqinisekanga ngomgaqo-nkqubo wokuqesha ibhari kunye nevenkile yokutyela apha, kodwa ndicinga ukuba kukho imfuneko yokukwazi ukuthoba abathengi ngolwaphulo-mthetho olucekisekayo loku-odola isiselo. Ke, bakuba be-odile eso siselo-kwaye bahlawula ubuncinci amaxesha amathathu kangako njengoko bebeya kwenza imizuzu engama-20 ngaphandle kwesixeko-bekwazi ukugcina ukudibana kwamehlo nabo ngelixa bengazisanga nto abayihlawuleleyo.

Unokubaleka ungene kwiweyitara enesidima kwindawo ethile apha endleleni, kodwa ukuba wenza amathuba sele beqalisile kwaye abakude kude bajike babe yenye i-jank wanker.

Ifoto ngu UHugo Denis-Queinec

AKUKHO MNTU UFUNA WENA
Intle kakhulu kuyo yonke indawo emhlabeni uya kulingeka ukuba ubuyele kwiklabhu yasebusuku kuba ubuyonwabele, abantu bebepholile kwaye umculo ubumnandi. EParis, izinto zisebenza umva; ngesizathu esithile, wonke umntu ubonakala ngathi ufuna ukuya kwiiklabhu ezonwabisayo ngokonakalisa ubusuku bakho.

Ndifumana ukuba ii-bouncers zifuna ukubakhona, kodwa andiqondi ukuba kutheni besiva isidingo sokujika abantu ngenxa yento enye ekhubekisayo yengubo. Ngubani oxelele aba bafana ukuba babeyiJoan Rivers? Kutheni le nto bacinga ukuba ii-winklepickers zithetha incasa elungileyo?

Andinazo iimpendulo zayo nayiphi na imibuzo, kodwa ndiyazi ukuba iiklabhu kufuneka ziyeke yonke into yokungena ekhethiweyo; uninzi lwezinye izixeko ziye zaqonda ukuba iikhowudi zokunxiba zitsala oomama ngoo-1980, kwaye lixesha lokuba iParis nayo.

Ezinye iidolophu ezanyisayo:

Izizathu zokuba kutheni iLondon yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu

Izizathu zokuba iLos Angeles yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu

Izizathu zokuba iSan Francisco yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu

Izizathu zokuba iPhoenix yeyona ndawo imbi kakhulu